Well let’s start with the peaceful environment because that was lovely. On first look the room was nice too. We paid extras and stayed in the Piper Heidsieck room for 2 nights, conservatory was a comfy space, a bottle of champagne and Ferrero Rocher in the fridge with 2 bottles of water (1 sparking 1 still). So that’s the good points. We had 6 oysters (Asian style) very nice and the tempura prawns, both delicious. Then we had lobster, 1 whole garlic and 1 half Thermidor. Well the whole lobster was 2 half sides (no claws etc) and tasted of ammonia, the Thermidor had a thick layer of melted cheese on it. Cost £165 for that and 3 drinks. Breakfast in with the price of room, had a filthy glass with lip marks all around the top, breakfast was not eaten (bacon dry, toast stale and eggs with black pepper and salt in huge crunchy lumps on. We then drove home an hour and half journey to eat in pub grub with family which was better quality. We went back for the night and bought snacks including pot noodles & sandwiches at the service station instead of dinner. The hot tub was green, literally green. The cleaners had cleaned while we were out but left the chocolate stained cover on the bed. Ordered 2 lots of 6 chocolate strawberries and got 10. Ordered roses and mixed bouquet, didn’t get the mixed bouquet. We didn’t complain to management, there was far too many complaints to be honest. First time away without our children in nearly 2 decades and I was gutted. I won’t be returning. It could be an amazing place if chips were fixed, broken tiles were replaced, the jacuzzi bath was descaled once in a while. Yes I had a bath and then there were bits in the bath, a cup full of bits of limescale in the bath with me. Showered as soon as I noticed and the hot water stopped in the shower too. Upside you can smoke in the little garden bit outside if shut doors. Needs a damn his clean and fresh lick of paint, new blind in bathroom as was mouldy, coffee stain on mat under kettle, limescale in kettle rather thick, all paintwork chipped and peeling, ashtray outside full up, oh and had a 2 min power cut when even the green highly luminous fire exit little bulb (no sign just bulb above door) went out which is actually not legal, should be on backup. WiFi not fab but in a rural area it’s a given and warned in paperwork (ripped and screwed up with marks on in the room). I actually washed my hands after reading the welcome pack. Little toiletries was a nice touch. Nothing can bring back the dampened spirits of our anniversary but the quiet atmosphere and comfy bed was nice. Just not worth £890.

Greet stay at the Who’d A thought it this weekend! A lovely room, big comfy bed, very nice heated conservatory space with all we needed and of course, a lovely, private hot tub! Nice bottle of fizz included in the fridge (as we booked directly), along with water and chocs. 2 tvs (not that we watched anything!) and a spa bath plus separate shower. Tea and coffee facilities, iron, hair dryer, straighteners, fan… everything we needed in the rooms. Very quiet - not sure we were!! But didn’t hear a peep from the neighbouring rooms. Dinner was lovely - friendly staff, nice chat and drinks with the owner and shout out to Sarah for making everything work(!) and the young staff at dinner were lovely too! Breakfast was very good and incl. in the room rate, which was a bonus. Wifi all round, parking space outside our room and they very kindly didn’t rush us out in the morning when we clearly were running late! The customer service is really good - our hot water wasn’t working initially, and within half an hour it was all resolved and a couple of complimentary cocktails for the inconvenience. The hot tub gave both of us electric shots(!!) at first, but all checked out quickly by their resident electrician and was deemed safe to go - it was the speed of dealing with the issues that impressed us. Things go wrong, but it’s how they are dealt with that sets a place apart. Very good and friendly customer service from Joe, Sarah and the restaurant staff. We will be back and can’t wait to try another room!

Hello, I was planning my trip and found the name of the hotel great. I booked but after that I found out it was in Kent! I did not check it that well. Later Joe helped me unbooked it. Great service Joe. Sorry I didnt come as a guest. The rooms are really lovely. Thanks

I must comment on the magnificent service we have received from the staff at Who’d a thought it. We have been several times now and everytime we come it just seems to get better and better. The staff have assisted us beyond their duties and can only thank them for the way they have responded and helped with our needs. Cannot wait to revisit. Would give 10 stars if I could. Thankyou.

Had a great long weekend staying at this quirky, eccentric and fun establishment. It’s a family run business and you can tell. Very warm and welcoming, friendly staff. Everything has a personal touch. The room itself was spacious, clean and comfortable. Everything you need. They even kindly put a lovely bottle of Cremant in our fridge as a special touch as we were staying there for a very special wedding. Breakfast was delicious. Best omelette I’ve ever had, apart from mine. We didn’t eat there otherwise so can’t comment on that. Everything about this place is eccentric and rather OTT so if you’re looking for a Hilton type joint, it won’t be for you. We loved it!

Stayed here for 2 nights, the review is solely for the room, the breakfast and pub service was great. Stayed in the Champagne and Shoes Suite, the room was run down and tired. Lights that didn’t work, holes in the bed throw, the sofa was heavily stained, the shower head spurts water 360 degrees because it’s split and limescaled up. The floor felt dirty to walk around on and there was thick dust under the bed. The room is open plan with a curtain separating the bathroom and living space, the curtain was heavily stained. Went to use the coffee machine to find water already in it, with a thick layer of scum on the top where it had been stagnant for sometime. For £700 for 2 night, I feel ripped off, it was not worth it at all for a room that is in clear need of a renovation.

First impressions of this hotel where amazing. I took my husband for his birthday and our anniversary and we had a premium room with a hot tub. We where greeted by very polite staff which showed us to our room. A lovely cold bottle of fizz and chocolate strawberries where waiting for us. The room was lovely, once you had a proper look round you did notice the odd thing here and there that needed to be repaired i.e. ripped wall paper, crack tiles in bathroom and the sky tv was a very old box tbat needed updating. In the end we gave up in the evening and watched Netflix on our ipad. Food was really good both dinner and breakfast. Really polite staff. I spilt a drink and was given a fresh free of charge etc. the pub part can get busy in the evening as its like a village pub but it was still a good atmosphere, no younger ****** kicking off etc. hottub was lovely! Room was lovely and clean. Would recommend. We stayed in lanison black. Theres also a little boutique shop there, was not open when we where there but hopefully next time. We will deffo be returning to try a different room or suite

My partner and I have been going here for a few years now. It’s our Sanctuary, the place where we go to escape the madness of modern life ! The restaurant is Amazing ( they have a new chef ) The Hot Tubs are just So So relaxing & 100% private too. The room decor is breathtaking ! Our favourite rooms are Vegas, The Dom & The Colosseum ( especially in the winter as The Colosseum has its Hot Tub in its own Conservatory ) I could go on & on ! We’re looking forward to our next visit to Who ‘d a thought it & we can’t wait !

Amazing! Surpassed all my expectations. We stayed overnight in the champagne and shoes suite and the room was immaculate, the jacuzzi bath was spotless and jets working perfectly which added to our relaxing break. Staff were accommodating, friendly and welcoming. Food was outstanding, highly recommend the lamb curry. Will definitely be coming back again.